Good Morning Peeps,

For those of you that know about the ordeal we went through with Bobbie Jo and a brain tumor 3 years ago. I thought I would show you how she looks today. She is doing well and loves her wild main of hair. If you remember she had to have her entire head shaved before the surgery.

Can't tell it quite as much here but she's lost lots of weight too. She is doing good keeping her blood sugar under control also. I'm so proud of her and how far she has come.

And this is our little girl (my granddaughter) that is growing up way too fast. These photos were taken during a warm March Saturday when we thought Spring was here. Now it has turned cold again and we even had more snow. I want to ring that groundhogs neck; or mother nature. I am soooooo ready for warmer weather.

Remember the word weaves I was talking about in my last post. The ones that I scanned and now are missing from the folder on the computer. Take a look here at the CraftyMoose blog to see one of them. I am sure Debbie will love your visit.

Have a great day,

Be Happy, Be Healthy, Be Safe,

Tess

February 17th, 2009 - One Year Ago Today

Today is February 17th, 2010.

I've been thinking about today, realizing that it is a very special day, for some time now. One year ago today my oldest daughter, Bobbie, had a brain tumor removed. It was one of the longest days of my life. So many fears in both of us, all of us. So many complications that could have come of it.

One possibility was that she would have severe permanent memory loss. This had not happened. She has mild blanks in the past few years and wonders how her daughter grew up so fast but other than that she woke knowing who we all were that day. (This was my greatest fear I think, besides death,

her not recognizing me.)

Another possibility was seizures. She is on an anti-seizure med and was told she would be for a minimum of one year and they would see about it after that. This may be a med she will have to be on for her entire life. At this point we still don't know. I'm happy to report she has not had one seizure the entire year. At least not one that we know of. WooHoo!

Another possibility was paralysis on one side. The day of the surgery and most of the day after this looked possible. But then she moved a toe and her stubbornness was still intact and she moved the leg, then the next day the hand started twitching. She now has weakness on the left side but is not paralyzed. She has to be careful on bad days how she steps or what she attempts to lift but other than that she is mobile and usually without her cane.

Bobbie still has a few obstacles to overcome or keep in check but she's doing wonderful. Her weight is down and she has that thick head full of hair back. Her diabetes is under control and she seems happy. She even seems to be able to know when her panic attacks are coming on better now and will warn the person she is with or just head home quick. If you suffer from an anxiety disorder (Bobbie is still bi-polar, but it is under better control) you know how scary this can be. She is hearing her bodies signals now. I think before there was so much going on in her head she couldn't concentrate long enough to understand the suttle signals the body will give us to let us know we are about to hit that panic button inside ourselves.

What a blessing God gave us through all of the many folks that prayed for Bobbie and through the surgeons hands. I thank you all and our Great Lord in Heaven every day.

I've been home sick and even sick I cannot just sit and one can only sleep so much. Especially with me taking prednisone, it wires me out. Like a mega dose of caffeine. (I'm so sweaty I bet I stink, and that's 10 minutes after a shower.)

OK so for the past few days with the approaching date I've been doodling in my journal. Journaling or journal doodling is a quiet activity which is what I needed and the word chaos kept coming to mind. Then the words noise, voices, sounds, headaches, fear, confusion and more. All of the many things that Bobbie was able to finally express to us that was going on in her head. She was living in chaos inside her mind and around her. I spied a bracelet that Bobbie had made me on my dresser vanity and the journal page came together nicely, as did the idea for this post.

Here I share the journal page, it is a 2 page layout:

I am not sure if this center doodle is a butterfly or a heart. It may be both.

Here is a close up of the left side:

And here is a closeup of the right side:

Bobbie at one point decided to try her hand at making jewelry. I believe that the tumor was already growing at this time of her life. She was already displaying weird signs, behavior, activity (falling down, always sleeping, fleeing, paranoid, dropping things, etc.) that later we learned were effects of where the tumor was (right frontal lobe). Bobbie knows that I like pearls. As a child wearing pearls made me feel grown up and as an adult they make me feel classy. She also knows I like mother of pearl with silver. Mother of pearl has such an iridescent quality. It is white, yet not completely just white. I love it, sometimes I think even better than pearls.

Bobbie made the following bracelet with a brain tumor in her head:

It will always be a special piece of my girl for me. Knowing that even when chaos was going on inside her mind she loved her mom enough to know what to make for me that would be special to me. I love this bracelet and I love that she made it just for me.

Happy Day Bobbie, Congrats on one year proving them wrong. They thought you'd have that seizure or seizures, you didn't. You've done good taking your medicines and on time. You've done good getting to know your little girl all over again. Keep it up honey. Don't worry about those things, those days, that you don't quite remember fully and just live in the moment for this day and the next. Give her the precious time you have now to make new and better memories. Help her build better memories of mommy so that the scary ones when you were so sick will gently slip away to fun and fantastic memories of her mommy spending time with her and loving her with all her might. Momma loves you sweetie, always have (even through the rough times) and always will.

Thank you all, my blogger friends, for listening and sharing in this glorious day with us. Today I am reminded that

This is the day that the Lord has made,

Be glad and Rejoice in it.

Be Happy, Be Healthy, Be Yourself,

Tess

Happy Birthday to My Bobbie...

Greetings

Yes, as you can see by the heading and the cake with candles, today is my first born child's birthday. Bobbie wished me a Happy Mothers Day today. I told her it's not mothers day, it's her Birthday. Her reply made sense. For years she has wished me a Happy Mother's Day on her birthday (I love that she remembers this) because as she puts it, "today is the day you became a mother". And she is correct at that. :)

She had a fun night out with friends last night and then we surprised her with lunch with us and her grandma and new pa-paw as she is calling Henry. (He grins so it must be ok with him.) We took her to her favorite local Mexican food place for her favorite fajitas meal. My granddaughter told them it was her mommy's birthday today. We expected the big sombrero and the singing but what happened during the singing made the day perfect. Take a look:

Open the tunnel here comes the train.
Oops! Missed, I better even it out.
Her favorite waiter got her good! I thought my mom was gonna fall off her chair laughing, or maybe Bobbie. She was so shocked I don't think she even had any time to think about being embarrassed.
Grandma to the rescue, she helped clean her up.

The staff had the whole restaurant serenading her. The patrons were willing and it turned out the couple sitting behind us personally new both my hubby and Henry.

It was so worth seeing this beautiful smile and hearing her laughter.

I realized today that her brain tumor removal was 9 months and 5 days ago. It's fitting she had a wild weekend to celebrate her birthday. 9+ months ago we weren't so sure she'd see this one. See it she did and on her own two feet and aware of everything. What a wonderful day it has been. I am so thankful to all of you out there that prayed for her and continue to pray today. You are all wonderful people. Thank You, Thank You and Thank you again.

Be happy, Be well, Be yourself,

Tess

Bobbie Update and Other Stuff

Just a quick howdy before I get busy with dinner prep and some yard work and then back to some crafty creating...

Bobbie did great with her procedure on Monday. The doctor said the filter came out no trouble at all. They went through a small cut in her neck. She was partially awake through the whole procedure. Just the thought of that creeps me out. They said she was chatty and she said the nurse standing closest to her head smelled wonderful. Silly the things we remember when we have medical procedures done. All she wanted Monday was coffee. Coffee, coffee, coffee!! :-) There was a fresh hot cup of coffee waiting for her when she returned to her room from out patient surgery. Wasn't that nice? There is such great communication among the nurses at St. Francis.

~~~~
Yesterday was my birthday and I had surprise phone calls and surprise gifts from many. Hubby took me to supper at the IHOP that just opened here. Good food and good atmosphere, we'll go back, next time for breakfast.
~~~~
I've joined an art swap and have been working on the "painting" I am swapping. It's my first real swap so I want it to be really nice. I just feel bad that I didn't get anything posted here about it before the entry deadline. I promise to do better next time. The Spring theme was easy and I even drew out something to create, however I was having trouble deciding on the medium. I finally decided and so far it really isn't looking anything like the drawing. I like what I'm creating though and how it is turning out so far. I just hope my swap partner will like it. I've really enjoyed the 6'oclock stitch blog and just wish I could remember who sent me her way so I could thank her (or him).
~~~~
Oh, and since April is National Poetry Month I've been doing poetry challenges over at Associated Content. I've done two so far and would love it if you'd take a peek.
Just click on Chocolate and Remember Those 80's Shows to read.
~~~~
That's about it. I hope you all have been having a great week so far. Blessings to you all until next time. (I think I'll do some blog browsing this evening, I miss you guys.)

Hugs,

Tess

Through Hard Work and Perseverence...

Bobbie has yet again bestowed a wondrous gift upon me. With a shining smile and giggly, wiggly step we made our way back to St. Francis Hospital today (actually yesterday as I just noticed it's past midnight) for a post-op cat scan and a visit with the neurosurgeon. The cat scan is clean, yep, it looks good. No trace of the tumor attempting to regrow. Yippee!! She goes in 6 weeks to visit with the rehab Dr. again and then has another cat scan 6 months from now. Dr. Ebeling said if that one looks good then there would be another every 2 years for a while just to keep an eye on the area and to be sure it's not trying top come back. Oh and the line between the two hemispheres was straight as it should be. Wonderful news.

And that gift I mentioned, well it seems a fellow blogger found need to bestow an award upon me in honor of Bobbie. So it is to Bobbie I dedicate the awesome

Bestowed upon us by none other than "Distracted By Shiny Objects" over at the A Tiding of Magpies blog.

The blogger who receives this award believes in the Tao of the zombie chicken - excellence, grace and persistence in all situations, even in the midst of a zombie apocalypse. These amazing bloggers regularly produce content so remarkable that their readers would brave a raving pack of zombie chickens just to be able to read their inspiring words. As a recipient of this world-renowned award, you now have the task of passing it on to at least 5 other worthy bloggers. Do not risk the wrath of the zombie chickens by choosing unwisely or not choosing at all...

Now I am certain that the fact that I am a fan of zombie movies, as is Bobbie, and the fact that I watched the movie "The Land of the Dead" with my husband this evening had nothing to do with this award. Or did it! So as not to incur the wrath of the zombie chickens I too shall choose to pass on this amazing award to 5 unsuspecting souls. Who shall it be? Let's see.....

How about

1. Turqouise CRO Thyme

2. Misty Mawn

3. Lori at elvie studio

4. Diane at Duda Daze

And of course

5. Marilyn at As Seen Through My Eyes

All 5 of these wonderful bloggers and so many more have laid words of wisdom upon my heart these past months and I just couldn't think of any better way to say Thank You.

And now it's their turn....

Who will they honor with the

??? :-)

Hugs and Good Night,

Tess

Surgery Rescheduled

Greetings all,

I've just a bit of news to share about Bobbie. Her surgery to remove the heart catheter has been rescheduled. It will take place on April 6th. A scheduling problem with the doctor I, I am told she is fine with it in place but that it is not needed so is best it be removed. As she had some signs of paralysis just after the initial surgery the catheter was inserted as a precaution to prevent a blood clot from getting into her lungs or brain which would have been fatal. as it is she has regained the use of both her left leg and arm. The arm and hand are a lot weaker than the leg but she is quite mobile and thus the fear of a blood clot forming due to being sedentary is gone. It was so good to speak to the nurse myself and better fully understand this. Bobbie admitted she was worried but is relieved to know that nothing is wrong.
~~~~
It is Spring break time here as it is in many places. My granddaughter has been making new friends in her neighborhood and having sleep overs with "adopted cousins", nieces of Bobbie's best friend. I took the afternoon off from work this past Wednesday and picked her up for a play date. It was a dreary overcast day, (I love how this photo of the sun turned out)so we went to see a movie. I took her to see Race to Witch Mountain. It is the remake of Disney's Escape from Witch Mountain. If you have a chance to see it you will enjoy it. A good family movie with Dwayne Johnson and two of the cutest kids in Hollywood. I didn't recognize either of them but have a feeling we'll be seeing more of them to come. It was a fun movie and my granddaughter was amazed that she was able to sit all the way through it. (Yes, it was that good.) She usually gets up to go to the bathroom half way through a movie.

Afterwards we drove through McDonald's Drive-thru for an ice cream sundae and then to the park to sit under the shelter and eat.

We ended up leaving this park to go to Wal-mart and then stopped at another park on the way home where she decided to play a while. She was swinging and climbing and crawling aound, while grandma clicked away with her camera.

A fun afternoon and something to tell about when she returns to school on Monday. I'm sure she'll be telling everyone she saw "the Rock" fighting aliens. :)

Till next time, be well,

Tess

A pictorial view of Bobbie...

She has gone from this...
To this...

And from here...

To here...

Wearing a crown of metal...

But who is this?....
Could it be...

It's Bobbie and she's wearing a smile...

One month later the crown is gone and the sight is almost healed,

And she's growing hair.......

A long overdue update:

Bobbie is healing well and smiling more each day. Her hair is coming in nicely and she seldom wears the scarves or caps any more. (Her daughter picked this scarf out for her.) We ask for prayers once again as she is to have surgery this Friday, March 20th, to remove the heart catheter they put in just after her first surgery. We have no idea why they want it removed now just that the outpatient surgery has been scheduled and it needs to come out. We are taking this as a good thing. Bobbie is much more mobile than I think any of the doctor's expected. That's my girl, stubborn as all gets out, and never one to stay down for long....

Many Blessings to you all,

Tess

My OWOH Prize Arrives & Another Update on Bobbie

Woo Hoo, My OWOH giveaway arrived today. Edrian was so kind to also send along a postcard and her business card showing off her artwork. She is just a wonderful illustrator. And I love her blog. I tried both taking a picture and scanning the items and I just could not get the sparkle of the bracelet to show in the pic. And the pretty gold foil pouch is just icing on the cake. The bracelet looks really small but it fits just fine, and it's lavender. I love it! Thanks Edrian!!

*************

And now for another update on Bobbie. She has now been transferred to the inhospital occupational rehab unit on the 4th floor. She is to wear her street clothes and will get more intensive therapy. And, they have convinced her she must quit smoking and she has agreed. They will be helping her with that too. She mentioned a patch. Her dear friend Tracy took her clothes and washed them to remove the cigarette smell and sprayed her shoes down with Lysol. He has agreed to quit smoking too. Now to get my son-in-law to agree to quit also, that would be great. We are looking at the rest of this week in the rehab unit working with the left hand and learning ways to get around. She handled the stairs well today and is walking just fine on linoleum and carpeting. :-) She is already practicing writing her name with her right hand. I am so glad they are teaching her these things now.

You all have a bright and beautiful day tomorrow and a calm and peaceful evening tonight.

Hugs,

Tess

Bobbie is Out of ICU

Please read an update on Bobbie at my AC site posted Feb. 20th first if you haven't yet here:
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1496189/update_on_bobbie_post_surgery.html?cat=5

Then see the photo update of my granddaughters first visit to see mommy since the surgery (below). The visit went well. Bobbie is out of ICU and in her own room.
Raven wasn't shocked at all to see her mommy without hair. We prepared her by showing previously taken pictures.

Bobbie has missed her little girl and so enjoyed her visit even though it really tired her out.


Gifts for Bobbie to brighten her room. The bear is a Ty Bear named The Beginning. We thought the name was perfect and so did Bobbie.

Bobbie gives a smile for all of the wonderful prayers, thoughts and words of encouragement she has received from family and friends here and in blog land. The black eye just appeared a few days ago as well as swelling and bruising on the right side of face. We are told this is normal.



The sun setting on a beautiful day.

Bobbie can walk, talk, use the bathroom and feed herself. Praise God!!

She still has trouble with some paralysis of the left hand and arm but can move it and is working with occupational therapy to strengthen it. This morning she said she fed herself breakfast and didn't even have to change her gown afterwards. She has stated she had no idea using a spoon could be so hard. She now understands what babies learning to use utensils must go through when we adults are impatient with them. I told her to take all the time she needs to master that arm/hand. Her walking is somewhat slow but she is gaining speed daily.

Thank You all for your wonderful gift of prayers and encouragement for us.

Flowers from her sister.

Please continue to pray for Bobbie's swift recovery............

Bobbie Is Doing Great!!!!!

Chuck and I are back home for a few. We left Robert in Topeka with Bobbie and a dear friend there, Tracy, will bring him home tomorrow night. Life still goes on even when we want or need to be with loved ones. Work calls for all of us and he is needing to see their daughter. As for Bobbie.........

She is doing great. I/we want to thank you all for your many prayers and positive thoughts for Bobbie. We also need to Thank Tracy and Brian for the use of their home so we would not have the expense of a motel. The pre-surgery time took about 90 minutes and then they called to say the surgery had started. About an hour and a half later a surgical nurse called the waiting room attendant to tell us that Bobbie's vital stats were steady and that the tumor is out. The surgeon was able to get it all without any trouble. About an hour later we were called to the conference room to speak to the surgeon. He said the surgery went extremely well and that the tumor was smooth. This is a real good thing as it means it will probably be benign. Of course they will have the tumor tested. He said she would spend 2 or 3 days in ICU before moving to a regular room.

Bobbie checked in yesterday at registration at 7AM and we gave our hugs and kisses before she was taken away at about 10:30 AM. We finally got to see her at about 3:30 that afternoon briefly in the hallway and an hour later we were allowed to file in 2 or 3 at a time to see her. She was very groggy of course and went in and out on us but all got to hear her voice and most got her to open her eyes. There were 8 of us their and many close by their phones waiting to hear. I apologize for not getting online sooner.

I can honestly say hearing Bobbie say "Hi Mom" after the surgery was more joyful to me than even that first cry the day she was born. She knew my fear that she would wake and not know me. She knew all of us and seems to be the "old Bobbie" again. Her feisty, humorous, lovable, obnoxious self is back; praise God. I love her so and can only say that if you have a loved one that you are at odds with, get over it and get back to loving again.

Bobbie had no movement and showed no signs of feeling on her left side the day of the surgery (remember the tumor was on the right frontal lobe). Today she is wiggling her left toes and moving the left leg. She is also talking without slurred speech and without repeating herself over and over. Her left eye was weak and did not open as much as the right at first but by early afternoon both eyes were opening the same. She still has not moved her left arm but has had some pain in the left wrist (the iv's are there) so this is a good sign that maybe it is just taking longer for the arm to wake up. A cat scan of her head was done this morning and the nurse said the Dr. was pleased with it. Her first meal was baked chicken with over fried potatoes, carrots and a salad. She didn't eat much but she did eat some and drank all of her tea, AND, she kept it down. Robert is keeping almost hourly notes in her journal and the first meal note includes a "What?" type of comment. While we were feeding Bobbie (She isn't allowed to sit up more than a 30 degree angle right now so I offered to feed her and she accepted.) she made a funny face and then said she has a loose tooth. She even reached in and tried to pull it. We stopped her and told her to finish eating on the other side. The loose tooth is on the right side. A few bites later she handed Robert a piece of her tooth. Casualty of the first meal, :-) I know it doesn't sound funny but she thought it was and after some chuckles we told her to slow down and of course she blamed it on me with a wink to Robert. Like I said, my "old Bobbie" is back.

She will stay in ICU until tomorrow (Thursday) afternoon and then may get moved to a regular room. We've had contact with the sitter daily and she spoke with her little girl last night and again today. I took my camera and took photo's for Bobbie's journal and to bring back to show my granddaughter. She was so pleased and even laughed at seeing that mommy really is bald. She wants her funny head wrap to keep but only after we wash it. Silly child!! :-)I've already started thinking on scarves and hats and such she will need for coming home.

As joyful as I feel I know it's not all over and she will have lots of healing time to go through, plus the issue of the left arm and how weak will the left side be once she is gotten to her feet. I want to thank you all for the wonderful blessing we have received from your many prayers and ask that you keep Bobbie in your prayers a while longer. I apologize if this seems a bit long or jumbled up, I am tired and still trying to make sense of it all myself.

Many Blessings to you all,

Hugs,
Tess
Both photos were taken today, Feb. 18th.

A new journal page done with colored pencils by flashlight. I didn't want to turn the overhead light on in the middle of the night. I had indigestion last night so had to sit up a while.

There is a new update on Bobbie at my AC site. Just click on her name to go there. And thank you for all of your uplifting messages and prayers.

Have a great day,

Tess

Healing Rays of Sunshine

This drawing from a past post .............

Became this painting. It is acrylic paint, glitter gel pens and Pilot Ball Ink Pen on a 9" X 12" artists canvas board. I am pretty happy with how it has turned out. I need to seal it still and maybe tweak the tree trunks a bit but other than that I think it is done. This will go to Bobbie.
I am now doing the same on water color paper with watercolor pencils. I forgot to do the background first so it's going to be interesting to see how it turns out. I refuse to start over as it is almost completely drawn in and I've already started adding some water. It's the sky part that I forgot to do. The sun and grassy hill is done and most of the flowers and I started the trees already when I realized the background is still white. Maybe I'll just add a bit of blue here and there and it will look a bit like clouds. Hmmm!

Bobbie had a good day today. She woke energetic and talkative and my son-in-law needed to study for a test so after a bit of visiting with her he took her to visit a friend and I picked her up and took her home when I got off work. She was still doing good so I took her with me to run an errand and then home to see her little one (the sitter was with her doing homework). It's nice to have a good day, I hope she has more of them between now and the surgery date. It is still Feb. 24th. Robert is at work and the sitter is going to fix supper and feed her before she completely tires out. She'll call Robert at work if she needs to go to sleep before he gets home from work to say goodnight.

"Always kiss me goodnight or at the least tell me you love me." I have no idea who said that but it's a great quote.

Remember to hug your loved ones real tight before you say goodnight,

Tess

I'm using my new fabric journal.

Praise God the washing machine is fixed and drain problem has been solved for now so that I can wash laundry at home. It's hard to double task at the laundromat when there are so many other things needing to be done at home.

I've been working on the healing rays of sunshine painting now and then. No picture yet though.

Anne at Gaale Creative posted about wordles and I found them interesting. I made one for Bobbie. Link is below....

title="Wordle: Bobbie wordle"> src="http://www.wordle.net/thumb/wrdl/520447/Bobbie_wordle"
alt="Wordle: Bobbie wordle"
style="padding:4px;border:1px solid #ddd">

I found that Wordle site a fun distraction.

Bobbie has fallen twice so far this weekend. She seems to get weaker every day. The 24th seems like an eternity away. And of course now there are Non-insurance issues my son-in-law is dealing with. Ugh!!

Thank you all for praying for Bobbie, please continue.

Tess

January's Journal - Day 28 and 29

I can't express enough how very much I appreciate all of the messages and words of encouragement and prayers that I have received here. Bobbie appreciates them too. It has been a whirl wind of activity these past days. My son-in-law is exhausted. My daughter has memories of some of it and none of others. She forgets a morning event by the afternoon yet remembers it the next day. I feel like I'm walking through a fog, a cloudy veil over my head. I can only imagine how she must feel, the fear, the uncertainty, the wonder. Family has been called, e-mailed, notified. Friends have been called. Her sister....she called her sister and actually got her on the first try. My youngest has trials in her own life. She and my son-in=law are laid off from work as of Jan. 31st with severance pay until March 15th. She called me yesterday to tell me she spoke to sis and got her to laugh. That's my little one, always looking to the positive, to the bright side of things. I had forgotten that Bobbie fell from a 3 story window when she was 17 and survived that. Her sister told her "hey if you can live through a 3 story fall you can live through this. I knew it was best for her to call her sister herself. I'm glad I insisted on it.
So far the meds have been switched again to alleviate vomiting, a prescription reaction to a pain med, and they added prednisone to alleviate inflammation from the bump on her noggin. They still have not told my grand daughter what all is going on. I don't know if they just can't bring themselves to tell her or if they feel it is best to not tell her yet. The Dr. office called and told them the MRI confirms what the E.R. doctor found. So now we wait until the neurosurgeon appointment on Feb. 19th. It seems like a lifetime away, that date. So far off. I want it to be now, they want it to be now, but we must wait. The neurosurgeons are booked we are told. So we wait and pray and hug a lot..............

Please continue to keep Bobbie in your prayers and thank you all so very much for the words of encouragement. They mean so much to me, to us.

This journal page is a collage of how I feel, in a daze, in a fog, a cloudy veil over me. It will lift, it must lift. I do not know what name this emotion I am feeling would have, what label. It took three tries at finishing this collage.

She is in HIS hands, I'm sure of this. The fall was a blessing.........., there is a reason for her madness. She's not faking, she's not being lazy, or ridiculous, she's changing, her personality is so different from what it was a week ago, amonth ago, 3 months ago and I want my daughter back. He wants his wife back. She'll be ok, she has to be, we need more time to finish and do and love. She'll be ok...........

Tess